Little things

It's really little things that mean the most, isn't it? Like when your husband brings you white pizza from your favorite pizza joint when you're in the hospital just because that's what you want more than anything in that moment. It's little notes colored by little hands, sent to you from your friend's daughter in Michigan to cheer you up. They don't cost anything. They're not fancy. But they mean so much. It's the nurse who stays up with you in your darkest hour the middle of the night to tell you everything is going to be alright, and believes it.

In the end, it's not about politics or this camp or that camp. It's not about "liberal" or "conservative" or about any black and white ideology or unneccessary drama we fill our lives with.

It's the little things that show true love and true devotion. The last two weeks have been the hardest ever in my life. But during those two weeks, I've learned clearly who truly cares for me and who doesn't. Sometimes, the results have shocked and hurt me. I know I cannot take it personally, however; perhaps some people just don't know how to deal with the acute seriousness of what's gone on. Other times, their reactions - or lack of reaction - has demonstrated to me what I already suspected.

What I do know is this: there are very very few people in this life you can count on to be there when things get this rough. And I am continually overwhelmed and humbled with gratitude and thanks to all of these people. I know who those people are now, and I am super thankful to have them in my life. You know who you are. Kathleen, with all your silent prayers from Minnesota; Sherry, for all of our long conversations about God; Joann, for cheering me up with your Mitch Seavey book; Brittany, for telling me it was going to be alright; "Super Dave" for finding veins when no one else could; Bob, for understanding; Michelle for your Mad Magazine; Paul, for the Sour Patch Kids, Runts and flowers; Kim, for the beautiful print and card and lots of thoughts from horse country; Tim, for making me laugh; Mom, for meatloaf :-) ; Cindy, Linda, Bob and Jan, Monica, Dana, Jen, Julie, Tina, Jill, JaX, Stacey, Rinda...thank you so much to everyone.

I am 100% weaned from IV antibiotics today and tomorrow, come hell or high water, I am going HOME! The very sight of this place - its smells, sounds, everything - makes me sick to my stomach. I cannot wait to feel the fall air on my face again, emerging stronger, wiser, better for having triumphed. Ultimately, having triumphed.